A different approach to those new year resolutions

I was thinking about resolutions and how the end of the old year always brings about doubts and thoughts about the new year.

I read this post recently and it got me thinking and reflecting on past years, and past resolutions.

 

1) Why limit it to January to become a better person? And what does ‘better’ mean? Why should you only limit yourself to ‘better’? Why not healthier? Or more self-aware? Or simply just happier?
2) Big bangs never work and imposing lots of change at the same time is a sure-fire way of disheartneing yourself and probably not keeping up that change.

 

Based on that, this post really appealed to me as every month it introduces a new ‘self care’ element rather than self-improvements – making myself better for myself rather than to be perceived as better (oh come on we don’t say we’re going to run a marathon to be healthier, we say it to show off).

Of course there’s things this blog fails to mention, like;
– What do you do when one month is up?
– Do you add the new monthly goal on top or do you drop Month one for Month two?

I’ll let you know, shall I? I plan on trying this and keeping you posted, because after all if I don’t write it down – did it really happen?!

 

From a personal persepective, this year was a really tough one; losing loved ones, moving country, planning a wedding etc. and what really got me through was frankly becoming a bit more selfish. Taking a bit more time for myself. Going for that run even if it meant the house wouldn’t be tidy for visitors. Having that drink with colleagues, even if it meant sacrificing gym time. Sometimes being selfish really saved me. I was getting burned out and I was getting sadder and more tired and the loop was just going round and round.

 
So what appeals to me for this year and this ‘resolution’ is to just take a bit more time and try and put myself first from time to time. I spoke to my firends about this over a few pints, and to my sister-in-law and it seemed a common theme on the ‘resolution’ front – doing something for oneself but to self-care rather than to self-improve.

 

So here’s my proposal to you, by all means run the marathon (I’ve also signed up for a Half because I’m silly and a hypocrite) but try and focus on YOU for the sake of you. Take that time to be a little selfish, accept that the house may not look perfct but at least you get to spend time meditating or running or doing whatever it is you want to do for you.

 

So, month 1 is ‘feed your soul’ – see you in a month.

On Happiness

I was asked to do a Christmas video card, as a nice gesture from one work colleague to a great couple who run one of the gyms where I teach from. To say thank you 🙂 And whilst doing this, it all became ‘about me’… (as most life experiences do for a lot of people, apart from maybe Mother Teresa and Jesus).

My friend who filmed it said I should jump in the lake. ‘What a great idea!’ I thought. It was mid-December and the weather had been particularly sunny and frosty; it was perfect. After I posted it on Facebook, a friend commented “you look so happy!” But actually, I wasn’t.

At the time I was not feeling particularly ‘happy’. I am not depressed, just not that happy either  – and it’s OKAY to be like that.

People can perceive others of maybe being ‘happier’ than them, have more ‘security’ more this, more that, that they couldn’t possibly have any worries in their lives, because look how happy they look in their newsfeed.

However, you never know what “troubles” people have. Maybe they just don’t externalise it. So I say – try and be kind to everyone, because who knows what they’re going through? Sometimes you have to ‘sit into’ an emotion to experience it – before you allow yourself to come out the other side. It is okay. Life can make you sometimes feel dull…and as a person of extremes, I enjoy the highs of life, while I am not easily able to ‘sit into’ the lows. (This is simply right for me) I try to dismiss the low times with a joke, or I do something stupid or have a mini drama, etc, etc. I am still, after many years, trying to sit into my ‘authentic self’.

However, after I came up from being submerged in the freezing cold water, I felt totally alive. I am still trying to feel alive. And still trying to accept the ‘bits’ (highs and lows) in between…

Namaste

XXX

Bitchmittens Ellen

 

 

Notes from the Ed

Ellen is a fully qualified yoga teacher, avid surfer, and a true Bitchmittens hero! For more awesome Ellenisms like this one, head over to her facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/EllenBaggsYoga/ If you’re thinking of yoga, Ellen teaches in Mountshannon, Craughwell, Portumna and Ballinasloe.

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